Which I realize is a common complaint for parents.
But my mom forwarded said rantlet to her friends, and one of them sent me a card via my mom today.
It says (with the bits in parentheses being the ones she wrote in):
(You can always pretend) it's your birthday.My birthday is in September.
Go to the bathroom alone.
(Good luck! S)
This kinda made my day.
Because moms just know.