My Executive Function Isn't

And frankly, this seems to be a common pattern in many people I know right now.

Even my mom, who is generally a bastion of the Just-Do-It (not in the Nike sense) school of philosophy, is struggling with it this week.

We are all just so tired of the constant crap. 

I keep seeing memes going around to that effect, including this one posted by my mom. For those of you using readers, it is (probably) a tweet that says, "I'm just so tired, so terribly tired, so utterly, totally 100% exhausted of thinking about him. I want to start thinking about other things, like all the major problems on the planet we've been ignoring by servicing the black hole where his soul is supposed to be for the last four years. @stevesilberman"

Another friend described the news cycle as "drinking from a fire hose." She's not wrong. I mean, I've learned to roll with the punches but they just. keep. coming.

And it makes us tired.

People think that executive dysfunction only applies to non-preferred tasks, like folding laundry (for me) or taking notes in school (for Liz) and that it only applies to ADHD or ASD  folks. But that's not true. It also applies to traumatized folks, which at the moment, most of us (at least those who do not share in the delusion) are. And it's affecting everydamnthing.

We kind of love decorating Grandma's house for Halloween/autumn, for instance. It's traditional in our family, we can still do it because her house and mine are our pandemic pod, and it just sort of kicks off fall. But we can't seem to work up the energy to go to the storage unit to get the decorations. The mere concept seems completely overwhelming. 

Now, some of this is other stuff - like the pandemic itself - that isn't directly caused by the Black Hole Who Cried Wolf but has certainly been exacerbated by him. I mean - if he hadn't downplayed the virus, left the states to fend for themselves, blah blah blah - we might be in a better frame of mind, because we would be expecting trick-or-treaters, for instance. But because he did all those things, especially in addition to all the other nationalist-racist-everythingist narcissistic bullshit, we just have no spoons left for fun. For anything but bracing for the next blow.

This is not healthy. 

And yet, here we are.