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Thursday, July 13, 2017

Off the Wall

Even more so than usual.

When I heard today on my lunch break that our president had suggested the Border Wall be transparent, I thought my lunchmate was joking. Or reading a satire site, because that sounded a little odd even by this administration's standards.

But it was true.

So let me see if I understand this.

He still wants to put up the Border Wall, to keep out The Mexicans, who are Bad Hombres and Rapists™.

And he wants it made of glass.

Apparently this is so we Pure, Good Americans™ can see when the Bad Hombres™ are pitching 60lb bags of "stuff" over the top, and what? Dodge?

Uh-huh.

But, um, glass.

Because, see, while we have invented transparent aluminum (but not this transparent aluminum, which would presumably be cheaper than what we can make at the moment), that's a lot of wall to make out of anything at all, much less an expensive manufactured product that right now only comes in a maximum size sheet of 18x35 inches. So, assuming that you have to stack them in portrait mode, at least three high so it's taller than your Bad Hombres™, well, let's do the math...

There are 63,360 inches in a mile. There are 1989 miles along the US-Mexico border. That's 7,001,280 sheets of transparent aluminum in one layer. Stack 'em three high and that's 21,003,840 sheets of the stuff.

Doesn't sound cost effective, but I guess they'll save that much by un-insuring anyone who has a pre-existing condition, unless they're rich, white, and straight.

Or maybe he'll pay for it by appeasing Those Wacky Liberals™ by topping it off with solar panels.

This is not how reality works.